{"id":672,"date":"2009-08-19T00:10:32","date_gmt":"2009-08-19T08:10:32","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.loftninjas.org\/rants\/?p=672"},"modified":"2009-08-19T00:10:32","modified_gmt":"2009-08-19T08:10:32","slug":"please-not-another-blank-subject","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"http:\/\/www.loftninjas.org\/rants\/2009\/08\/19\/please-not-another-blank-subject\/","title":{"rendered":"please, not another blank subject"},"content":{"rendered":"<p>Finally tracked down a couple of friends to see <a href=\"http:\/\/www.imdb.com\/title\/tt1022603\/\">500 days of Summer<\/a> tonight. I didn&#8217;t want to go alone or with a stranger to see, as Hannah confirmed, &#8220;a Bryan movie.&#8221; Why is it that I&#8217;m totally unashamed of my big heart until it becomes <em>a burden<\/em>? General confidence issue, specific confidence issue, or hurt surrounding what is promised to not be a burden, abruptly is?<\/p>\n<blockquote><p>This is a story of boy meets girl. But you should know up front, this is not a love story.<\/p><\/blockquote>\n<p>Rad conversation about relationships online tonight after the movie. Got thinking a bunch about how resilient I am over the long term, but still vulnerable to being hurt interim. That&#8217;s probably the right place to be. Movie still has a relatively happy ending that puts the moral in giant bold letters across the screen. That&#8217;s alright.<\/p>\n<blockquote><p>You weren&#8217;t wrong, Tom. You were just wrong about me.<\/p><\/blockquote>\n<p>Yeah. Maybe you&#8217;re right. It&#8217;s still kinda sad.<\/p>\n<p>I want to exclaim that I&#8217;m awfully fucking tired of being mistreated. That&#8217;s not fair on a couple levels. It&#8217;s an exaggeration to start. I&#8217;ve dated some good people. How to say this impartially? I suppose it&#8217;s mostly looking back at being wronged and feeling upset about it. The emotion is a bit overwhelming. I guess the memories that hurt the most are the ones where I put a lot of effort in drawing a line and communicating clearly (jesus, thinking about this conversation makes it clear that it has gotten better over the years) that I&#8217;m crossing it solely on a basis of trust, then having that trust violated.<\/p>\n<p>And some other stuff. Sleep.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Finally tracked down a couple of friends to see 500 days of Summer tonight. I didn&#8217;t want to go alone or with a stranger to see, as Hannah confirmed, &#8220;a Bryan movie.&#8221; Why is it that I&#8217;m totally unashamed of my big heart until it becomes a burden? General confidence issue, specific confidence issue, or [&hellip;]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":[],"categories":[1],"tags":[],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.loftninjas.org\/rants\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/672"}],"collection":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.loftninjas.org\/rants\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.loftninjas.org\/rants\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.loftninjas.org\/rants\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.loftninjas.org\/rants\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=672"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"http:\/\/www.loftninjas.org\/rants\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/672\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":673,"href":"http:\/\/www.loftninjas.org\/rants\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/672\/revisions\/673"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.loftninjas.org\/rants\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=672"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.loftninjas.org\/rants\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=672"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.loftninjas.org\/rants\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=672"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}